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	<title>Comments on: Is there any other way that I can write this paragraph?</title>
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	<link>http://www.purewebconferencing.com/web-conferencing/internet-web-conferencing/is-there-any-other-way-that-i-can-write-this-paragraph</link>
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	<lastBuildDate>Thu, 09 Jul 2009 00:52:32 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>By: BennBJ Bear</title>
		<link>http://www.purewebconferencing.com/web-conferencing/internet-web-conferencing/is-there-any-other-way-that-i-can-write-this-paragraph/comment-page-1#comment-1155</link>
		<dc:creator>BennBJ Bear</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Jul 2009 09:43:59 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Turtle is correct. Your post is not a paragraph, it is one long run on sentence..and frankly my eyes glazed over before I got halfway through.

Reading takes not only comprehension of the actual word, it requires being able to pick out the key words/phrases you wish to impart. The format you have used makes it next to impossible to do so. Try reading it without stopping (which you must do without using a period, right?) and see if you make any sense of it.&lt;br&gt;&lt;b&gt;References : &lt;/b&gt;&lt;br&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Turtle is correct. Your post is not a paragraph, it is one long run on sentence..and frankly my eyes glazed over before I got halfway through.</p>
<p>Reading takes not only comprehension of the actual word, it requires being able to pick out the key words/phrases you wish to impart. The format you have used makes it next to impossible to do so. Try reading it without stopping (which you must do without using a period, right?) and see if you make any sense of it.<br /><b>References : </b></p>
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		<title>By: TurtleFromQuebec</title>
		<link>http://www.purewebconferencing.com/web-conferencing/internet-web-conferencing/is-there-any-other-way-that-i-can-write-this-paragraph/comment-page-1#comment-1154</link>
		<dc:creator>TurtleFromQuebec</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Jul 2009 09:30:59 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>With a humongous list like that, it&#039;s clearer and easier to read if you put it in point form, like this:

In the fourth chapter, I first describe the policies and behaviors associated with E-learning tools, such as: 

- collaboration tools (e.g., Audio and Video conferencing, E-mail, Online discussion boards, Chat, Online meeting tools)

- authoring tools (e.g., Authorware, Web course builder)

- etc etc.

When you finish the list, at &quot;introduced&quot;... take a deep breath and start a new sentence. Also, try to use active voice: &quot;I note their capabilities and compare their weak and strong points in different applications. I also indicate the share of E-learning tools in standards and specifications such as...&quot;

I have fixed your first par. a little too. A couple of points:

-- Present tense is better than past tense when describing the paper you are writing

-- Try to use ordinary words instead of pretentious academic jargon. 

So &quot;I describe&quot; is way better than &quot;I sought to record&quot;.

-- Use one sentence for each thought. There&#039;s no point in running everything together into a single sentence. 

And so the last par. reads better if it&#039;s divided into several sentences. See my suggestion above.

All this is standard advice on good academic style, I hope.&lt;br&gt;&lt;b&gt;References : &lt;/b&gt;&lt;br&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>With a humongous list like that, it&#8217;s clearer and easier to read if you put it in point form, like this:</p>
<p>In the fourth chapter, I first describe the policies and behaviors associated with E-learning tools, such as: </p>
<p>- collaboration tools (e.g., Audio and Video <a href="http://www.purewebconferencing.com/HotWebConference" style="font-size:14px;color:#FF33CC;font-weight:bold;"   onmouseover="self.status='conferencing';return true;" onmouseout="self.status=''">conferencing</a>, E-mail, Online discussion boards, Chat, Online meeting tools)</p>
<p>- authoring tools (e.g., Authorware, Web course builder)</p>
<p>- etc etc.</p>
<p>When you finish the list, at &quot;introduced&quot;&#8230; take a deep breath and start a new sentence. Also, try to use active voice: &quot;I note their capabilities and compare their weak and strong points in different applications. I also indicate the share of E-learning tools in standards and specifications such as&#8230;&quot;</p>
<p>I have fixed your first par. a little too. A couple of points:</p>
<p>&#8211; Present tense is better than past tense when describing the paper you are writing</p>
<p>&#8211; Try to use ordinary words instead of pretentious academic jargon. </p>
<p>So &quot;I describe&quot; is way better than &quot;I sought to record&quot;.</p>
<p>&#8211; Use one sentence for each thought. There&#8217;s no point in running everything together into a single sentence. </p>
<p>And so the last par. reads better if it&#8217;s divided into several sentences. See my suggestion above.</p>
<p>All this is standard advice on good academic style, I hope.<br /><b>References : </b></p>
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